December, an end to 2013

Here we are again as another year reaches its end.  This month has had some lovely quiet moments and some hectic ones.  Tensions that flow with the cycles of life and death that the earth clearly wants us to embrace at this time of year.  And yet we find it so hard to embrace them....

  Our solstice was perfect and quiet and just us four.  Its bookend was sickness for us with recovering just in time to celebrate Kyan's 6th birthday even if we were the worse for wear.  Our Christmas was not white but that was fine with me.  A little bit of snow around this time of year is all we need to feel the energy of winter arrive.

Tonight will be a thoughtful one for me.  I plan to think, evaluate and count my blessings.  There are not many words today.  Happy New Year.

Fair November

What a stunning month November was this year.  The thing about my birth month is that most people find it wet, cold and depressing.  Which I try not to take personally really.  I mean, there is little I can do to redeem it for anyone...it is what it is.  Except when it is not.  Like this year when it was sunny almost every afternoon and that sun streams down like a gift to those of us that are usually huddling under umbrellas and feeling pale and gloomy by mid month.  The above photo is of two bald eagles on the edge of the Harrison river.  This was their moment to feed on the salmon as they return to lay their eggs and die in the process.  Such a fascinating life cycle and such a delicate balance that we were privileged to witness this year. 

On the right in the above photo lies the Harrison Hot Springs Resort & Spa where we luxuriated in the healing waters for a lovely weekend.  It was the highlight of the month for me.  So relaxing after a busy month of soccer games, gatherings, school, cleaning...you get the picture. A mini vacation it was and a grateful person am I.

And just cause I want to share a lovely poem I found about November that gives it a nice sentiment rather than the gloomy one that is often associated with the 11th month.

November comes

and November goes,

with the last red berries

and the first white snows.

with night coming early, 

and dawn coming late,

and ice in a bucket, 

and frost by the gate.

the fires burn

and the kettles sing,

and earth sinks to rest

until next spring.

-Clyde Watson

October Memories

 The first time we trekked out from the city to the country to pick apples and pose with pumpkins was 6 years ago.  The biggest guy in these pictures was only 2 and the second biggest guy was in my belly.  The next year we had two little ones and one on the way (actually only a month out).  Several years and subsequent visits later we brought the littlest one who decided to sample the dirt during his first pumpkin photo shoot.  And this October these pictures were taken of four rapidly growing boys.  In various stages of becoming men.

 The thing about tradition and growing up is that while we adults try and create memories we really can't.  Ultimately what the boys remember will depend on them, what is important to them, what they value, what sticks as odd or fun or silly.  It may be that I may cherish these outings way more than they ever do.  I acknowledge my part in that, my attempt to influence their childhood stories to reflect my own values and interests.

 There was no picture where they all looked at me and smiled.  Photographing 4 boys between the ages of 8 and 2...good luck my friend.  But in each one you can see a characteristic; the stoic leader, the mischievous one, the thinker with his heart on his sleeve, and the unpredictable wild card.  Each so close and yet miles away from the person they could be tomorrow or were yesterday.  

There are many definitions of family that ring true for me.  I don't hold one above all others because the path of my life has taught me that every type of family that we encounter whether we are born into in, make it ourselves or have it forced upon us shapes us and teaches us more about ourselves.  All I can hope for these 4 is that the family that they most certainly are gives them strength and deep love and acceptance that they can carry their whole lives.

Shapes of September

 

September was of course a lesson in adaptation for us.  Kyan going to Kindergarten was the whole scope of the month.  A little getaway with friends, a soccer routine to get into....and weather that was just steady.

Can it be that almost 4 months have passed since this new routine came about?  And while we are not old pros yet we certainly have a rhythm that wasn't overly disruptive to our lives.

Kyan likes school.  He does well with the schedule and while he is more tired as seasoned parents always say happens that first year, he takes it all in stride.  The transformation has been positive.  I see his confidence growing, his ability to adapt is better and his learning capacity is impressive.  We have yet to get a report card, but I don't feel I need to read it to understand how he's doing.

What I see and what he exhibits is very promising for a school experience that enriches him.  But as with everything we'll just take it one day at a time.

August Fades

Oh how quickly the days pass from warm summer sun to the weaker sun of fall.  Our August was bright and full of fun days.  Visiting more of our home province and trying to enjoy the last few weeks before Kyan's first year of elementary school.

 
After the heat of July August faded in and out and moved with a more deliberate pace.
We saw some incredible sights; walking through old train tunnels, visiting community gardens, and gathering with friends to share music.

A highlight of the month was to witness the blossoming of dreams being realized.  Artists close to me (including myself) creating, working, striving to find their place and bring their truth to the world around them.  This manifested differently for each of us but filled my heart with a steadfast joy.  I feel lucky to have been there and experienced that moment in time.

The Urge to Share

This year's blogging break has been quite a cathartic change for me.  I want to send a quick thank you to those of you who are still reading along.  I can't say that things will get more frequent here, but I will say that when there is something I need to share it will be recorded here.

Last year I experienced a wonderful renewal at Autumnal Equinox and I think this year has brought the same freshness to my perspective.  The coming of the rain brings insights into my journey.  They are not always clear or wrapped nicely for me to discover.  In fact they are often at the bottom of a pile that requires me to sit and slowly evaluate and discard things one by one.  But what I am grateful for is the chance to move through the pile at my own pace.

Launching my art career has is now coming upon a year mark.  It was last year that I discovered an opportunity and followed my instincts.  Now I am about to pick up my work from my second show this year with 2 or 3 more (hopefully) to come before the calendar year ends.  My mind is slightly blown from how life moves when things are falling into place.  It feels really good, really right for this moment in time.  I am building something for myself along with building for my family.

So my health goals and career goals are on track now.  As for my spiritual goals...well they are still sitting in a corner of my mind.  I see them and their importance is not lost on me.  They call, I hear them.  In this moment I struggle to find a place for them.  I struggle to find words for them, while at the same time my continual refusal to name something so deep and personal still surfaces.  For now, well, they wait.   I know that they will find their place in my life when the opening happens.  By opening I mean that life will find a space as it has before.  That the seasons of our world are reflected in the movement through our days and we must accept that the pace of the dance is not ours to control.

There is more, so much to share.  Thoughts, new stages, new opportunities.  All in their own time.

Sunny July

Literally the sunniest July on record we had not one drop of rain.  Our family had some glorious views both as a foursome and as a twosome. Dave and I had a getaway for two for the first time in 5 years.  There were beach visits galore, swimming classes, deadlines, a wedding, and lots of lovely heat.  It almost felt like summer was bottled up into a month, but at least we made the most of it this year.