April's Restless Moon

There are many more poetic names for April's moon: Pink moon, Sprouting Grass moon, Egg moon....but at this moment Restless is all I can call it.  After two nights in a row of disturbed sleep, tossing, crying, calling out, strange dreams, I'm a little on the grumpy side.

This month has been great in terms of weather, we've planted some seeds, watched some grow bigger than their little pots, started soccer, singing and swimming.  The boys have taken a cue from the seedlings and are growing and eating like crazy.  The events in Boston, Texas and family emergencies have been overwhelming and emotional.

The fullness of this time of life comes up often.  Full schedules, full heads, the fullness of life being reborn with the spring.  I'm trying to take concrete steps to keep us flowing with this but the month has left both Dave and I and probably the boys too feeling tired and slow to adjust to the longer days of light.

My new artwork schedule has been put in place and is rewarding beyond words.  Having set aside that time to just make art and let out the images or words that build up inside out of my head, along with a weekly yoga practice and time in nature feeds my soul.  I feel like a more whole person; like the pieces of me that have been on the back burner have equal footing.

With this change comes transitions that are contributing to the restlessness though.  Weaning Elliott, I remember it not being easy and overall it is going very well.  But there is a certain cry he'll make at night when he really just wants to nurse but I've already given him his scant allotment of two short sessions and it is just so forlorn.  It makes me so sad.  That cry cuts right to my guts, pulling out guilt and sorrow for the baby stage that is soon to go and will never be seen again by us.  It is really such a personal thing between him and I, a journey begun at his birth, somewhat of an extension of the pregnancy itself in that only the two of us share it.  I can only hope that we are moving at a pace that is sensitive to his development and that once this season of our bond comes to an end it will fade into his unconscious like it did with his brother in such a way that Kyan has no memory of nursing beyond the physical closeness that we shared which he continues to experience through hugs and cuddles.

Change, transitions, new green, sprouts, sunshine, rain, restless birthing spring.

Book of the Month: Moon Mysteries

I was lucky enough to win a copy of this fantastic book last year.  Written by Nikiah Seeds and Nao Sims and illustrated by Eyan Myers this book celebrates an intimate side of womanhood, our menses.
Moon Mysteries: Reclaiming Women's Menstrual Wisdom takes the reader through 13 months/moons and features personal reflections from each author as well as historical and spiritual associations with different aspects of our menstrual cycles.
From our connection to the tides to our relationship with motherhood and our sexual partners this book is designed to be a workbook with custom charts for filling in and recording moon phases and emotions throughout our monthly rhythms.
Moon Mysteries is a journey helping us to honour something that our culture has come to denigrate making us in turn do the same.  Celebrating, writing in journals, taking time to acknowledge the changes that your body goes through each month all of that and much more is possible in this book's pages.
I love how each chapter is named by a themed moon as so many cultures have done for millions of years.  The Green Witch Moon, Blood Moon, Dreaming Moon, Serpent Moon - so much lovely imagery for the soul.  And speaking of imagery for the soul Eyan Myer's illustrations are stunning and invoke magic for the reader.
Although the book is not specifically pagan it speaks to the deep magic of ancestral devotion and the spiritual side of living.  I would recommend it for any thoughtful woman's library as a treasure to read through again and again.

J is for new Journeys

Last week I stumbled upon a new to me project that was started at the beginning of the year.  The Pagan Blog Project goes through the letters of the alphabet and each Friday you pick a topic beginning with that letter.  This week is J and so I've chosen the word Journeys.
Finding this project has been a step in the right direction for my languishing spiritual path.  I have celebrated Sabatts here and there and have acknowledged the moon as she passes.  I've had intentions of refreshing my altar and planning rituals with friends.  But life gets in my way so often and I just haven't had the dedication I want to to make these plans a priority.
Taking this journey with my blog and focusing my intentions once a week will be a positive step forward for me.  As the boys get further from the baby stage that time will increase, I know.  I try to be present and not fixate on what I can't do.  So joining this project is giving me a sense of what I can do.  Can I plan an elaborate ritual and dance under the full moon, no.  Can I cook with mindfulness and think magical thoughts while stirring a pot of soup, sometimes.  Can I spend Summer Solstice at the beach and bask in the sun for the longest day, hopefully.  And can I write about what my spirituality means to me once a week, yes.
This journey is about finding and redefining my path for myself.  As we grow so too does our path and what we need from it.  Summer is almost here and there is warmth on the horizon.  I'm looking forward to sharing the beach fronts with my almost running 14 month old as he gets to let waves splash on his toes.  Camping trips, preserving wonderful local food, picnics, hiking and watching the gardens grow.  So much goodness to the summer journey ahead and so much is lovely in the spring journey we are already on.  Robins dancing on the grass, windy days, Kyan learning to ride a two wheeler, Elliott's third clear word emerging as cheese.
As my pagan path weaves this way and that, over hills and dales, through thick brush and sunny meadows I have to adapt and reevaluate what it all means to me.  And as the boys grow they will need guidance in their journey's as well.  Learning about different religions, spiritual philosophies, and what they need for themselves.
As the sunshine promises to stay awhile this weekend it seems perfect to just bask it in and let time roll along slowly.
Here's to your new journeys and a wonderful Mother's Day weekend for us all.

so fresh and so clean

Through the fun that is pinterest I found a challenge that over 11,000 people have decided to join.  And for the first time in my search for help in this area I've found a step-by-step organization guide that makes sense to me.  The 52 Weeks to an Organized Home Challenge is following a schedule that I can manage (I think) and I already began week one today.  The kitchen is the starting point and  week one focuses on the counters.  Clearing them of things that don't need to be there and keeping them as clear as possible once you have decided what functions the kitchen serves in your home.  For us the kitchen is about food prep, storage and my mini life control center.
I think for many out there the advice on keeping the kitchen clean or organized may seem so logical that it doesn't need to be noted.  When it comes to my artistic, dreamy and some would say flaky mind these things are not so obvious and bare repeating.
I'm glad to have found this and just looking at my kitchen counters now I see that they are more enticing to me to cook on now that they have less stuff on them.
In other new year news I've finished up two projects and I'm excited to move on to finishing up a few more things before I get back to Ky's quilt and start the Memory Keeper piece for 2012.  Perhaps the New Moon energy would better suit the pace of these days rather than the full moon that shines on us tonight but I'm pleased none-the-less to be getting things accomplished.  2011 often felt like my feet were in mud and I was moving really slow.  Being in the land of baby will do that to anyone I suppose.
I didn't take a before shot of my counters but if you read my last post there is enough proof that this looks way better.

   

my full moon

I love to hear the variations of names for each month's full moon.  Corn moon,  Sturgeon moon, Grain, Red...the list of names for August's is probably as long as there are tribes all over the world who honoured the moon's light.  I decided that this moon's energy was perfect for a small ritual of empowerment.  I used the essence of four runes and the elements, along with the full moon to charge four objects for each family member.  While each of us needs something different our collective bond grows stronger each day.  Becoming a family unit, the weaving of our threads together, happens naturally without much effort but I can't see how helping that along is a bad thing.  When things feel at loose ends or too chaotic I appreciate the ability to focus our intent.  My object was the Carnelian broach in the photo above (also blogged about here).  I asked for stamina and for wisdom in finding small moments for myself.  I opened with a dedication to the moon stating my intent.  Following that I called on the qualities from each rune we needed and then I raised energy by chanting a poem on page 63 of A Victorian Grimoire: Romance - Enchantment - Magic.  Then I charged the objects one by one, consecrating them as I went and recited a small closing.  Simple without any bells and whistles.  It's all about the baby steps around here....

Earth Day Outside

We made it out twice today and made the best of sunshine for Earth Day.  The last three days have been a bit of a whirlwind since we started swimming class this week and this is the first structured class for Ky and I.  Day one was scary for him but by day two he was smiling and laughing and I was reassured that he will adapt to working with a teacher and being more comfortable in the pool.  We did make it out each day brief though it was.  But today we really got some sun and this morning it was also quite windy.  He's sleeping now and after deciding not to nap today was really zonked by supper time.

April 20, 21 & 22

 He's been talking lots about climbing trees recently even though he's not a very skilled climber yet.  Today I remembered this big old tree that was more suitable for "climbing" for him. 

Greetings

Hi everyone.

I took a bit of a break from blogland for a few weeks, soon I'll be caught up on all of your holiday doings. Our holidays have been great. Our west coast bones have been shocked from some seriously cold days but we tried to take advantage of the snowy wonders while we could. We fly home on Monday and so you can expect regular posts after the 4th. I wanted to share some pictures from our holidays...hopefully you aren't all holidayed out yet. Before we get to the images I wanted to welcome the new followers who have appeared over the last few weeks, thanks for joining me on this little journey.

I also wanted to share that the new Pagan Pages article is up. This month I wrote about flow in parenting as it relates to the element of water. And Angie at the Pagan Writers Community has posted an interview with me since Chasing Domestic Bliss is the featured blog there this month. I have a fun (hopefully) surprise for everyone next week, so Happy New Year and happy weekend to you all and I'll be back here on Tuesday.

Our Solstice table

Solstice fire

My parents who joined me despite the cold (my Dad built the fire for me) I am blessed with loving and supportive parents

A walk in the woods on a warmer day....only -5 Celsius

The blue moon on New Year's eve.

Feel the power

This is my first post inspired by Pagan Blog Prompts. The prompt is about the feminine monthly cycle, our menses. And since I am bleeding with the full moon at this time (I usually move between new and full moon at least once a year) it seems like a perfect area to explore.

My journey in feminism and paganism have helped me determine what my menstrual cycle means to me. I remember waiting for it to appear at 13 when most of my friends had already started. I looked each day, waiting for something to happen. There was a mystique about it, some strange feeling it gave me to anticipate becoming a part of this club. When it came I freaked out. I called my mother to the bathroom and almost passed out. It is a hilarious memory for my mother and myself. I have no idea why I reacted that way. Once I calmed down I felt the small seed of feminine power begin it's blossoming.

And in a few months I hated it. Cramps, mood swings, I wondered what all the fuss had been about. I feel like society's views of menstruating: "that time of the month" "the curse" "your period" all the terms, the negative energy, the hassle starts to weigh us down. How can we have a positive experience of our cycles when everyone puts them down and we are expected to ignore them and pretend they are not happening and be "normal"?

Through a lot of internal work I have come to a very different place now. My friend Heidi affectionately calls her period her "moon" and I have adopted that term as well. It is my moon. My connection to the cycle of the moon. As it pulls the tides, it moves the blood within me. I am full of the power of regeneration. My womb is discarding this cycle to begin again. There are few other things that make me feel as connected to the universe as menstruating.

My one issue with this time is that I have to go on doing all the everyday things that I do during the month. If I had my way this is what would happen...

I feel a tinge, a hint of intuition that today my moon begins. I remove my clothing and dress in red. A long, loose and flowing gown, a shawl and a scarf over my head. I bid my family farewell and say I will see them in 4 days. I will miss them but know that I will return refreshed and ready to undertake my tasks with renewed vigour.
I tread on a worn path through tall trees. I hear the animals of the forest but I have already begun my inner journey to a deep place within. Here I will be completely inside. I will have no obligation to speak, no needs to meet but my own. I come to a secluded spot that holds a yurt-like structure. There are many women here. Young, old, thin, fat, blond, Asian, German, blind, tanned, short...they meet every description. They are every woman who also bleeds with this cycle, or they are pregnant, or they are saying goodbye to their menses, or nursing those that need healing at this time. Everyone speaks in hushed tones, there are no demands. We just are. I will come to this hut when I need food or quiet companionship for the next 4 days. I will sleep, eat, meditate, read and bleed. I will squat, lean on trees and bathe in the river. I can rest here, recharge, renew. At night I can gaze at the full moon, feel her pull the waters inside me and be cleansed in her light. I eat strawberries, tomatoes and beets. I sing songs of the earth around a warm fire. I sway with the wind and drink the rain. My name is not spoken...I cease to be in my head.
At the end of the 4th day I begin my walk back home. I enter my house and things are neat and quiet. I speak softly to my family, we are happy to be reunited. I drink tea and prepare myself to come back to my daily world. My moon is not over but is waning. I resume my work slowly so as not to undo all the rest I've won. In 3 more days I am back to full capacity. The cycle begins again.

Since I can't have the rest I have described above I do try and be easy on myself during my moon. My patience is low, vulnerability high. I drink raspberry leaf tea, I try and walk to keep my body from getting cramps. For several years I wore special red underwear during my moon. It's a great time to wear red. I try to commune with the moon...I try to do many things. It is a special time. It is a time of great power. I hope that the pagan community can explore the woman's mysteries more in theology and writings. We need to reclaim this time as sacred. Deep in my bones I feel that it once was a sacred time for us. Men and women revered this powerful cycle and gave it a place to breathe. Changing our notions about menstruation can only empower women and men to be more authentically ourselves.

Moon Cord Ritual Tool

One of the activities of my full moon ritual this month was making this Moon Cord. This cord is meant to be a tool for magical use. So if you want to wear it for moon energy, or keep it on your altar during the moons etc. it can really be used however you see fit. The concept of three in terms of New, Full and Dark moon, as well as Maiden, Mother, Crone; are a main theme in my spiritual practice. I think everyone can relate to this energy and I know for myself it cycles through my month.

Supplies you need: three pieces of cord, wool or string etc: One for each moon phase. I chose 3 colours: the new moon an iridescent pink woven with mauve, for the full moon a bright white woven with silver, and for the Dark moon black. I also included some shiny, silvery moon charms. I painted a wooden box with the triple Goddess Moon symbol to keep it in, when I gave the supplies to a friend as a gift.

After casting a circle, you light a candle as a focus for which your moon energy.
Next braid the three cords.
You are then ready to charge the cord.

Use three Goddess aspects for each phase. I chose these three based on my own preferences and my friend's as well. But personalizing this can only help with the magic. I chose Artemis, Isis and Hecate.

As Artemis leads us with her torch
To the spot deep in the wood where her silver new moon waxes,
I charge this cord with her strength of a lioness,
And her depth of the darkest forest

As Isis holds the knowing of our own wombs
With her gifts of renewable abundance
Her full moon reigns almighty
I charge this cord with her all-seeing third eye
And her ever constant gifts of truth

As Hecate holds the moon’s magnetic reins
With her ancient spells, letting the night sky rule dark and cool
I charge this cord with her old Heka magic
And her power as Mighty Queen of the Witches

So Mote it Be.

Once the aspects are drawn in to the cord knot it nine times. Since I used thick cord I could not knot it so I tied three moon charms on and knotted the embroidery floss three times on each charm. Leave it with the candle to charge under the moon energy. Try to store it wound in a circle to retain the charge.

As a little disclaimer, this is the first Spell type posting of mine. I am not the creator of this spell, but I no longer have the source of it either. I did change it, as I'm sure anyone who does it will further change it to suit their needs.


I would like to send a special blessing to the people of Mumbai (formerly Bombay) India, at this tragic time for the world. I pray that the seed of hatred that is trying to be sown by these terrorists is rejected and in it's place compassion and healing can grow. Namaste.

Art of the Month: November

Drawing Down the Moon, ink on paper, 2000

This piece is pretty literal. I did a whole series of work on the moon for an open media class. This touched on the witch's act of drawing down the moon. It is a very graphic piece for me, but I was trying to keep simplicity in mind. I wanted to capture the essence of many becoming one. Thirteen as One in the act of changing consciousness at will.